The Los Angeles Dodgers ranked the second worst out of thirty teams in the Urine Feces Everywhere (UFE) ratings. The Dodgers may now be under new ownership, but they have the same old problems inside and outside the park. There are security issues as gangs have increased their presence around the neighborhood of the park, which has become a real issue inside Dodger stadium. Just last year a San Francisco fan was brutally beaten outside of Dodger Stadium, and reports say more and more fans are becoming increasingly nervous about attending a Dodgers home game.
Dodgers Stadium first opened in 1962, and restrooms back then were the neglected step-child of the baseball parks. After the stadium design was completed the architect would look for any nook or cranny to place the restrooms. Consequently the restrooms are cramped, poorly lit areas that scream at you to get out of there as soon as you can. Dodgers Stadium is one of only three MLB stadiums that still have urinal troughs. There is folklore at the park that says if you put your ear really close to the water in the urinal trough you can hear the ocean, just like putting your ear to a seashell. What you really hear when you put your ear close to the men’s troughs is Thomas Crapper’s voice (he patented the original toilet) saying, Please return this toilet to me, it’s an antique.
The UFE team was shocked at the squalor conditions of the men’s restroom inside Dodgers Stadium. As the UFE team observed the universal lack of hand washing in the men’s restroom, one question constantly came to mind, when did it become cool not to wash your hands? A whopping 63% of the men at Dodgers stadium don’t wash their hands. I know the amenities are old and conditions are very poor, but congratulations to female Dodger fans for scoring a very respectable 3% non-hand washing rate.
As for the rest of the stadium, the UFE team would like to see more hand washing, and more hand sinks installed at the concessions. Employees need to stop handling food and beverages with the same hands that took in money, and the condiment stations need to be cleaned. The entire stadium needs better lighting, as well. The UFE team agrees that if you want to see a safe and clean Dodgers game then think, “Away Game”.